One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. In each scene he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand...one belonged to him and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene had flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints and noticed that many times along the path, that there were only one set of footprints in the sand.
He also noticed that this happened during his lowest and saddest times in his life. This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord, "God, you said that once I decided to follow You, You would walk all the way with me. But I noticed that during the most troublesome times of my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed You the most, You deserted me."
The Lord replied, "My precious child, I love you, and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried You."
____________________________________________________________
I know that everyone has probably already seen this but I really felt like I needed to post it for myself right now. It is so easy for me to feel alone and resentful of my heavenly father when I am struggling. Just last night I found myself so frustrated. Why isn't he helping me overcome this?....Why is he not here for me when I am struggling?.....Haven't I dealt with this long enough? Thoughts kept flooding into my head.
Then I thought about something that Michelle(my therapist) said to me one time. When you are struggling, maybe it's not satan trying to ruin your life but rather your heavenly father trying to get you to dig deeper so that you can learn a new lesson. I guess my goal today is to figure out what exactly I need to learn. What do I need to learn about myself, life, relationships, spirituality, etc to be able to really let this eating disorder go?
I am going to try and really trust that the times that I feel so lonely and scared, my heavenly father is carrying me. He is there with me every step of the way. He will not let me fall. He will hold me until I am able to once again walk on my own.