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Thursday, June 5, 2008

Rational Behaviors to Overcome Perfectionistic Tendencies

To overcome perfectionism one needs to:

  • Accept self as a human being
  • Forgive self for mistakes or failings
  • Put self back on the wagon immediately after falling off
  • Accept that the "ideal" is only a guideline or goal to be worked toward, not to be achieved 100%
  • Set realistic and flexible time frames for the achievement of a goal
  • Develop a sense of patience and to reduce the need to "get it done yesterday"
  • Be easier on oneself; setting unrealistic or unreasonable goals or deadlines sets you up for failure.
  • Recognize that the human condition is one of the failings, weakness, deviations, imperfections, and mistakes; it is acceptable to be human
  • Recognize that one's backsliding does not mean the end of the world, it is okay to pick oneself up and start all over again
  • Develop an ability to use "thought stopping" techniques whenever you find yourself mentally scolding yourself for not being "good enough"
  • Visualize reality as it will be for a "Human" rather than for a "Super Human"
  • Learn to accept yourself the way you are, let go of the ideas of how you "should be"
  • Enjoy success and achievement with a healthy self-pride, and eliminate the need for self deprecation or false humility
  • Learn to enjoy success without the need to second guess your ability to sustain the achievement
  • Reward yourself for your progress
  • Love yourself
  • Eliminate unrealistic expectations and the idea that you are infallible
  • Visualize yourself as "winning" even when it takes more energy and more perseverance than you had planned
  • Let go of rigid, moralistic judgements of your performance and develop an open, compassionate understanding for the hard times, obstacles, and temptations.
  • Be flexible in setting goals and be willing to reassess your plan from time to time to keep things realistic
  • Be open to the idea that you will be successful in your efforts to change, even if you are not "first" "the best" "the model" "the star pupil" "the exemplar" "the finest"
  • Realize that the important thing is to be going in a positive direction

9 comments:

Courtney said...

Thank you so much, I needed to hear this today and I am printing it out right now and putting it on my bathroom mirror. I need all the rational reminders I can get because my brain tends to get stuck in irrational, perfectionistic loony land!

Krista said...

Thanks Whit. Did you write that poem on the last post? It was beautifully written.

Whitney said...

I didn't.....I totally forgot to write author unknown though...whoops! Thanks for reminding me!

brie said...

That all seems so simple! I'm going to do it all tomorrow and be cured in time for our double date. SWEET!! ;)

Carlie Michelle said...

Whit- I miss you so much! I hope you are doing well! I hope you know how deeply greatful I am to see what a testimony you have gained. To know that I was apart of that is the greatest blessing I could ask for. I'm so proud of the person you have become! I love you to pieces! Lets get together some time soon!

Love your guts!
Carlie

KC said...

wow, this is an amazing list! thanks!

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Anonymous said...

great tips!

Dana xo

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