12-step Promises

“If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us — sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.”

A Better Way of Life

Author Unknown

I sat trembling as I listened
To the words that were spoken to me.
It seemed I had broken all the rules,
So blinded I failed to see.

The power, that had weakened me,
Led me on a sinful course.
For, now, I found myself frozen
And reeling from great remorse.

Flashbacks, of a life I had led,
Haunted the depth of my soul;
Laws that I recklessly squandered,
While acting out various roles.

This monster, who had promised me
That my life would be rich with fun,
Had taught me how to turn my back
And how my Lord to shun.

Satan is the name that visited,
Stripping the love from my heart~
Until God's presence granted me
Forgiveness and a brand new start!
He told me that His love for us
Will never bend or weaken
And that forgiveness is always granted
When we listen while He is speaking.

Rational Behaviors to Overcome Perfectionistic Tendencies

To overcome perfectionism one needs to:

• Accept self as a human being
• Forgive self for mistakes or failings
• Put self back on the wagon immediately after falling off
• Accept that the "ideal" is only a guideline or goal to be worked toward, not to be achieved 100%
• Set realistic and flexible time frames for the achievement of a goal
• Develop a sense of patience and to reduce the need to "get it done yesterday"
• Be easier on oneself; setting unrealistic or unreasonable goals or deadlines sets you up for failure.
• Recognize that the human condition is one of the failings, weakness, deviations, imperfections, and mistakes; it is acceptable to be human
• Recognize that one's backsliding does not mean the end of the world, it is okay to pick oneself up and start all over again
• Develop an ability to use "thought stopping" techniques whenever you find yourself mentally scolding yourself for not being "good enough"
• Visualize reality as it will be for a "Human" rather than for a "Super Human"
• Learn to accept yourself the way you are, let go of the ideas of how you "should be"
• Enjoy success and achievement with a healthy self-pride, and eliminate the need for self deprecation or false humility
• Learn to enjoy success without the need to second guess your ability to sustain the achievement
• Reward yourself for your progress
• Love yourself
• Eliminate unrealistic expectations and the idea that you are infallible
• Visualize yourself as "winning" even when it takes more energy and more perseverance than you had planned
• Let go of rigid, moralistic judgements of your performance and develop an open, compassionate understanding for the hard times, obstacles, and temptations.
• Be flexible in setting goals and be willing to reassess your plan from time to time to keep things realistic
• Be open to the idea that you will be successful in your efforts to change, even if you are not "first" "the best" "the model" "the star pupil" "the exemplar" "the finest"
• Realize that the important thing is to be going in a positive direction

A Better Way of Life

I sat trembling as I listened
To the words that were spoken to me.
It seemed I had broken all the rules,
So blinded I failed to see.

The power, that had weakened me,
Led me on a sinful course.
For, now, I found myself frozen
And reeling from great remorse.

Flashbacks, of a life I had led,
Haunted the depth of my soul;
Laws that I recklessly squandered,
While acting out various roles.

This monster, who had promised me
That my life would be rich with fun,
Had taught me how to turn my back
And how my Lord to shun.

Satan is the name that visited,
Stripping the love from my heart~
Until God's presence granted me
Forgiveness and a brand new start!
He told me that His love for us
Will never bend or weaken
And that forgiveness is always granted
When we listen while He is speaking!
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Sorry that it has taken me so long to get a new post up. I have been extremely busy with school and work but have decided to make sure I am taking the time to do things helpful to my recovery. I hope that everyone will continue to find this blog inspirational in times when they are struggling.

Quote

"The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing."

- John Powell

Stage Coach Drivers

It seems that back in the old days, a stage coach company was advertising to hire a new stage coach driver. Three applicants had been selected for interviews. Each was asked the same question: "How close to the edge of the cliff can you drive and still be safe?" The first man said: "I am such a good driver that I can drive within one inch of the edge and still be safe." Not to be outdone, the second man answered: "I am such a good driver that I can drive with half the wheel over the edge and the other half of the wheel on the ground and still be safe." The third man's answer differed radically from the other two. He simply said: "I don't know how close I can safely drive near the edge of the cliff - I always stay as far away from the edge as possible." The third man got the job.

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I think that in our eating disorders we all try and get as close to the edge of the cliff as we possibly can without having our dietitians, therapists, medical doctors, etc feel that we are no longer safe. As tempting as it can be to hang on to the little pieces of our eating disorders that bring us feelings of comfort (keeping us close to the edge) I think that it is so important to try and let go of all of the little behaviors so that we can keep ourselves safe and healthy and set ourselves up for a successful life.

A Memo From God

Date: Today
To: You
From: God
Subject: Yourself
Reference: You're Life

I am God. Today I will be handling all of your problems. Please remember that I do not need your help. If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do not attempt to resolve it. Kindly put it in a SFGTD(Something For God To DO)box. All situations will be resolved, but in My time, not yours. Once the matter is placed into the Box, do not hold onto it by worrying about it. Instead, focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now.

Effective immediately, please be aware that there are changes you may need to make in your life. These changes need to be completed in order that I may fulfill my promise to you and to grant you peace, joy and happiness in this life. I do not apologize for any inconvience, but after all that I am doing, this seems very little to ask of you.

I know that I already gave 10 commandments. Keep them. But follow these guidelines, also.

1. Quit Worrying

Life has dealt you a blow and all you do is sit and worry. Have you forgotten that I am here to take all your burdens and carry them for you? Or do you just enjoy fretting over every little thing that comes your way?

2. Put it on the list

If something needs to be done or get taken care of, put it on the list. No, not YOUR list. Put it on MY to-do-list. Let Me be the one to take care of the problem. I can't hlep you until you turn it over to me. And although my to-do-list is long, I am after all, God. I can take care of anything you put into my hands. In fact, if the truth were ever really known, I take care of a lot of things for you that you never even realize!

Love,

God
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I think that it's art time everyone. We should all create a God box so that we have something that we can toss our worries into when we just need to let go. I think that I might stop by Michaels sometime this week to buy a box to paint. I am kinda excited, I won't lie.

Footprints

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. In each scene he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand...one belonged to him and the other to the Lord.

When the last scene had flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints and noticed that many times along the path, that there were only one set of footprints in the sand.

He also noticed that this happened during his lowest and saddest times in his life. This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord, "God, you said that once I decided to follow You, You would walk all the way with me. But I noticed that during the most troublesome times of my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed You the most, You deserted me."

The Lord replied, "My precious child, I love you, and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried You."

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I know that everyone has probably already seen this but I really felt like I needed to post it for myself right now. It is so easy for me to feel alone and resentful of my heavenly father when I am struggling. Just last night I found myself so frustrated. Why isn't he helping me overcome this?....Why is he not here for me when I am struggling?.....Haven't I dealt with this long enough? Thoughts kept flooding into my head.

Then I thought about something that Michelle(my therapist) said to me one time. When you are struggling, maybe it's not satan trying to ruin your life but rather your heavenly father trying to get you to dig deeper so that you can learn a new lesson. I guess my goal today is to figure out what exactly I need to learn. What do I need to learn about myself, life, relationships, spirituality, etc to be able to really let this eating disorder go?

I am going to try and really trust that the times that I feel so lonely and scared, my heavenly father is carrying me. He is there with me every step of the way. He will not let me fall. He will hold me until I am able to once again walk on my own.